Why January is a terrible time to make resolutions
Okay, I’m going go out on a limb here and say that at some point in your life, you’ve probably made a bunch of resolutions at New Year’s, most of them in earnest, and then by like…let’s say… January 8, you kinda forgot about half of them.
Maybe you lasted until the end of the month if you’re a champ.
And you probably felt bad about it for a while. Until your brain did you the favour of burying the memory of making those resolutions deep, deep into your subconscious so you wouldn’t have to think about them until you were nursing a hangover on January 1 of the following year.
And you know what, you’re not alone.
The research shows that most people completely abandon their New Year’s resolutions by January 19! The 19th!
So why do we keep doing it if we know we’re just setting ourselves up for failure? Where did this whole New Year’s resolutions thing get started? Who’s the absolute bastard who came up with this idea?
Some dude in ancient Babylon, apparently.
The tradition is said to be around 4000 years old. But back then, they held their New Year’s in March, not January, because they weren’t total masochists like we are today. January is the worst. March makes more sense because it’s almost spring, and the air is filled with the fresh scent of hope that you’ll soon be able to escape the nightmarish frozen winter hellscape you’ve been living through for the past five months. #canada.
The fact that the celebration was moved to January 1 represents a sort of amalgamation of traditions: one part Roman mythology (January is named for the god of new beginnings, Janus), one part Greek traditions (for them, the New Year was the winter solstice, around December 20), and one part Julius Caesar being all like, “Hey guys, check out this new calendar I just made, isn’t it dope?”
So, now we all celebrate New Year’s on January 1. A time of year when you’re most likely always slightly bloated, cold, sad, hungry, and basically just in full hibernation mode.
I’d like to propose something a bit different vis-a-vis the old-time folks. A simple, three-pronged approach to setting better goals that you actually care about and then, you know, actually achieving them. You’re going to rest, reflect, and redirect.
1. Don’t make resolutions in January.
Just don’t do it. If anyone asks you what your resolutions are, quietly leave the room. Or punch them in the face. Whatever. Don’t answer that question. Don’t think about it. Don’t buy an elliptical trainer you’re never going to use, or sell your TV or purchase any annual memberships to anything. Just don’t.
2. Don’t make any resolutions in February either.
You need these months for rest and reflection.
Rest in January because, let’s face it, you probably ate too much, drank too much, and didn’t exercise at all over the holidays. And I’m in Canada, so up here, January is cold AF, so it’s a good time to stay inside and pretend that outside doesn’t exist. Draw the curtains, turn off your phone, and grab a seat on the couch. You need to rest. So rest.
In February, you reflect. What do you actually want? Not what you think you want or what you think you should want based on other people’s opinions. What do you actually want to do with your life.? And what can you do this year that will help you get there? Building in time for rest and reflection gives you the headspace you need to decide whether or not you’ve been focussing on the right things.
How would you know if your resolutions and your actions and everything you’re currently doing is bringing you closer to happiness if you don’t take a moment to reflect on it? And drunken moments while in a bathroom stall on December 31 don’t count.
3. Use March to redirect.
Redirect your thoughts, your actions, and your choices to ensure greater alignment with your actual wants and goals for your life. And then make a plan of attack. How are you going to get from point A — where you are now — to point B — where you’d like to be a year from now (one giant step closer to whatever big life goals/desires you have). Thinking about this will take time. Planning takes time. And the reason why most resolutions fail is that they don’t incorporate a plan. Without a plan, your resolution is just a wish, and we’re done with all that. Wishing and hoping never gets you where you need to go.
This is my third year doing things this way. For me, it’s so much more effective than running off a list of resolutions I’m not genuinely resolved enough or too overwhelmed to actually do. Taking the time to rest and reflect on where you’re at is vital for mental health and will make you more productive in the long run.
The world is too fast-paced, and there are already a lot of people running around looking busy and confusing that busyness with doing something that actually matters to them. Don’t be one of those.
This year, why not do something different? Kick it like the ancients, and make March the month of intentional resolutions. Celebrate new beginnings in a season that doesn’t hurl you into existential despair brought on by an overdose of baked goods and a Vitamin D deficiency. What have you got to lose?